“I’m sorry to hear about your problems.”
That was the statement I found myself saying the other day to an acquaintance of mine. I also attempted to help him find a solution, but he was too intent on not only feeling sorry for himself, but in enlisting others to do the same for him. At least until I was able to convince him otherwise.
Basic problem solving technique is a 3-step
Of course, we want instant results and that won’t always happen. However, the eventual result for a successful outcome will always begin immediately, even if we don’t see it when beginning this process.
Everyone has the first step down. The challenge is they may not go to number 2 for a long time, if ever. First the 3 steps, then how to implement them.
1. Acknowledge the problem. Magnify it, inspect it. Attempt to understand it better and how it may have come about. If you feel blame towards any third party, fine, but then come back to yourself. What was your part in it? We are always a part of the problems we have.
Don’t berate yourself over it. Pledge to learn from it, even if it’s as simple as increasing your awareness. Which is something worthwhile to tune in to daily, regardless of how well things are going.
2. Acknowledge that there is a solution for it. Yes, there is a solution, somewhere, somehow. People at any given moment are either problem conscious or solution conscious. As long as you’re the former, the problem can’t possibly be solved. Shift!
Don’t worry about what it isn’t, pledge to find the clues to a solution. Great inventions, chemistry, and philosophies have been discovered because of individuals who were confronted with the impossible, so they had to make them possible.
3. T.A.N Take Action NOW. People with problems can only have two outcomes, victim or victorious. There is no middle ground.
Impatience will be your greatest enemy if it brings you to quitting. Sometimes your solution may be to go another way, join with another person, remove yourself from certain people who may be a party in the causes of your problems. Quitting a job is not the same as quitting. Quitting a project may not be either.
In fact, the phrase giving up, may be more apt. As Winston Churchill said in a famous speech,
How do you know you’re not quitting? What does giving up or not giving up mean? These are the mini or sub-problems before many a solution is discovered.“Never, never, never, give up!” Find another way.
The process for solving these sub-problems is the same. Sometimes you need assistance from a trusted friend, advisor, psychologist or coach. These are all a part of the tools of life to keep in mind.
The Human Potential.
You are a live solution creating mechanism. Activate Your “Inner Wizard,” it’s always there. Keep searching. Answers exist, sometimes in the most unlikely places. Never give up.Shift, change, reexamine, improve, seek help, prioritize, make it real in your mind. Whatever you seek and not yet achieve is synonymous with a desire you have.
I urged her to start thinking outside her corporate “box” thinking. List other possibilities, other desires. Ask herself why she wanted that particular position, what it would mean to her life? She did. It wasn’t the position, it was what it would mean in her financial life and professional life. She realized there would be other ways to achieve this.
